Baby Rivals
by Blaze808
Summary: What happens when your stuck babysitting archenemies...as babies. Poor Riesa is about to find out, it's not pleasent. What happens when a catastrophe is about to take place? Well let's find out! Shall we?
1. Introduction

**I do not own Pendragon. And that's that.**

Hello reader! Before you read this, I should warn you that this story is filled with slap fights, a very tortured nanny, a tarantula, and a flying…pig! Yes, you heard me…a flying pig. Other words, this story has a plot, but it's RANDOM. Anyway, enjoy Baby Rivals. As much as you can. Let's hope we all survive the wrath, 'kay?


	2. What could happen?

**I do not own Pendragon.**

**Riesa: Where am I? I thought I was supposed to be in **_**A Queen's Story?**_

**Me: You are. But you need to be here too. You may not like this particular one.**

**Riesa: Oh joy. Sometimes I hate being an OC.**

One September day, I was strolling in the park, with my pet cat. You'd be surprised how many people don't appreciate the pleasure of owning a very friendly cat. My cat likes to take walks, so mine's a bit odd. Then, my cat, Blackie yowled. She only did that when something was wrong. I pulled out my sword. So I guess I'm a bit strange for Earth. But hey, you had to be prepared for everything. Then Blackie yowled again. I swore I heard somebody screaming like some outraged animal. When somebody does that, and you hear metal clang, I consider it a problem. I walked into the bush, and to my surprise, a person was attacking a person while filled with pure rage. I ran in to stop them. Unfortantly, before I could get any farther, a blue light enveloped them. They had vanished! I couldn't believe it! I was worried that they were dead. That worry was taken care of when I spotted two babies on the ground with striking resemblance to the two strangers that had been in brutal combat. The worry was replaced by another: How was I supposed to take care of two babies?! But, I could learn, right?

**Not exactly, shall we say, after all, these baby characters are archenemies. So, what will these bundle of terrors do to poor Riesa? Send in your ideas!**


	3. Stroller Blues

Stroller Blues

I picked up the two and tried to calm them down. Didn't happen. The two started screaming. Loud, very loud. I swear I almost became deaf. A woman came over.

"I was going to sell this, but I think you need it more."

It was a stroller. A twin stroller, one I could use for the babyfied (is that a real word?) boys. I thanked the lady and set the boys inside. The brown haired boy started to whimper. The grey haired boy rolled his eyes and stated something I didn't understand. The brown haired boy did. And it wasn't nice. He screamed something back. The grey haired boy whimpered, sniffled and then, to my surprise, ripped a piece of the material and whacked the other boy over the head. Then, guess what? The other boy grabbed my hairbrush, grabbed the grey haired baby's hair and attempted brushing. Rough. (Did I mention the hair was almost "taller" than him?)

3 minutes later, I had grabbed the brown haired boy and held him, while pushing the stroller with the other. A thought came to me. This was going to be a LONG day.

**What did you think? If you want me to translate what the words that were exchanged, I will do so. Do you have any ideas on what they could do to poor Riesa and Blackie? Let me know.**


	4. First Day on the Job

**I do not own Pendragon **

**First Day on the Job**

I walked in my door, and tried to put the babies down in the cradle, from Mom's daycare, after all, I had to open the door for the person that followed me in. It was the mailman. I let him in; after all, he was also one of my friends.

"Hey ya Rick! How are you?"

"Glad…what's that noise?"

It sounded like a repeating clunking and constant crying. I ran into dad's office/daycare room, and to my surprise…the grey haired boy was smacking the brown haired boy with his rattle. I turned around to think of a plan, when something fell out, but without a clink. It was my sword, and the grey one had grabbed it, but was having MAJOR trouble lifting it up. I snatched it from him, and guess what? He started to cry. No, I lied, it was more like he was wailing, in an attempt to make me deaf! I pulled the grey one out of the crib, and grabbed the plush paddle and spanked him. Sure, it seemed heartless, but I think the intention was to impale the brown one! Rick ran in, and took the grey one from me, and to my relief, (and annoyance) he calmed down to a soft whimper.

"Shush, shush, its okay, you're going to be fine." Rick spoke softly.

I decided from then on, Rick could take care of this kid.

"Do you know their names?"

"No, not really."

"Well, maybe we should name them. At least for the time being. Until we can find someone more appropriate to take care of them." Rick suggested.

"NO! We do not find more *suitable* homes for them!"

"Why not?"

So I spent the next 10 minutes telling the story to Rick.

"Okay, thanks for filling me in. What should we name them?" Rick asked

"Maybe we can ask them. Hey guys! What're your names?"

The brown one spoke first "Bobby!" With a LOT of excitement

"Danwiel" The grey boy spoke shyly, and I translated it to Daniel.

"Okay then, Bobby and Daniel, welcome to the house!"

Later that evening

I turned on the television to the Treehouse channel. I, for one, HATE that channel! It also didn't help that Sesame Street was on. The only thing I liked about it was Elmo's Got a Gun, but that's it. Apparently, they didn't like it either. Bobby grabbed the remote and turned to TSN. Basketball was on. It was a match-up of the Chicago Bulls and Toronto Raptors. And to my surprise, Toronto got a ball in the net, and I immediately found out what age area Bobby was in. 14-16, or SOMEWHERE near, because in "congratulations", Bobby held up the one fingered salute. I grabbed Bobby and held him close. Now, in Daniel's opinion, the remote was now his. He flipped it to History, and (this really freaked me out) had an expression on his face, as if trying to plot something, and was writing weird scribbles on paper, as if he was making a plan. Then the T.V. went fuzzy. Daniel banged it, as if trying to get it to come back on. Then, a pig appeared on screen. With a very human like expression. A creepy one.

**Uh-oh! What's going to happen? Did some pig ranchers hack the satellite or is something more sinister about to happen?**

**Tell me what you think. By the way, I have an acknowledgement to make. Thank you Pencildragon98, for the baby fight scene! If you liked that scene, read There's not only 10(Make sure you come back after!)**


	5. The Baconater

**I do not own Pendragon**

**The Baconater **

"Everyone focus your attention of me! I am the Baconater! Your worst nightmare! One of you foul humans ate my mother's brother's aunt's 96th cousin, 15 times removed, and since I don't know who…I'LL GET YOU ALL! MWH-HA-HA-HA!!!! I'll turn you all into babies, then turn you into bacon, then I"LL EAT IT!!! These were my first test victims!" Then the Baconater displayed the pictures of the two strangers, and their new forms.

Bobby started to turn red. I swear I saw smoke coming out of his ears. He ran into my kitchen, and a flying piece of raw bacon hit the T.V screen.

"Tat's wat will happen wu BUM!"

I looked over and saw Daniel, doing some version of meditating. He looked mad, but at least he was keeping cool. He walked to the T.V, grabbed the bacon that had almost fallen to the floor, put it on my plate, the scrabble game, an unused napkin, my used toothpick and our forks. He put the bacon on the plate and stabbed the forks into the bacon. Then he found the letters Y-O-U. He spat into his hands and rubbed the napkin and stuck the letters in order. He walked up to me

"Backmail." He suggested

He saw my expression "To the fying piggy."

I was about to correct him, but then I saw the pig on the screen, flying away."

"Do you know anyone that can help? Guys?"

They nodded, and ran for the phones.


	6. Calling for Backup

**I do not own Pendragon**

**Calling for Backup**

Bobby grabbed the phone and dialled in a number. The Chetwyndales' number.

"Helwo? Cwourtney? It's Bobby. Mean piggy, need help."

I just grabbed the phone. "Hi, Courtney! Listen, cousin, you know how you're used to really weird things?"

"Yeah? What's the problem in Toronto?"

"Well, to make things short, there are two boys- Daniel and Bobby, which have been turned into babies…"

"I thought I recognized that picture! Who's Daniel?"

"I was hoping you knew, hold on." I looked down at Daniel, who was trying to get my attention.

"Nevva?"

"No, this is Courtney, my cousin in Stony Brook."

"Oh…her. She's annoying!" He responded, sounding disappointed, that I hadn't called this Nevva person.

"Do you know who this Nevva person is? Daniel just asked for her, or him…"

"Is he talking about Nevva Winter?"

"Let me ask him…(I looked down and said)Do you mean Nevva Winter?"

"Yeah." His face turned pink, as he closed his eyes and fiddled his hands behind his back.

"Yes." I responded to Courtney.

"Holy!!! I got to see this!"

"What's so funny?"

"His name is actually Saint Dane…"

"No, my name is Daniel, but Pwess stoted to cwall me Swaint Dane."

"Did he hear me?"

"Yep, he responded. Do you know where I can find this Nevva Winter."

"Yeah, she's working at the library, replacing for Bobby's mom before she went missing. She's going by the alias Katelyn Smith. Maybe if you show her the babies, she might believe you."

"Thanks a LOT! By the way, where is she?"

"Apparently, she's looking for somebody, and from what you told me, it's him, and she's at your end."

"Thanks Courtney! Really appreciate it!"

I really hope she would recognize him. We needed her to. Bad!

**Hey loyal readers! Glad to see more reviews! What should happen next, and don't worry. Blackie's going to get it. How did you think of this chapter. Will Courtney be able to give them a hand-in person? Is Nevva going to recognize her partner? Or is this all Riesa and the babies show? What do you prefer? I'm open for suggestions!**


	7. Spring Cleaning

**I do not own Pendragon**

**Hi, Loyal Readers! Here is Chapter 7: Spring Cleaning**

Chapter 7: Spring Cleaning

I sat down. How was I supposed to find this Katelyn Smith? But then I remembered something that happened four days ago…

_Flashback_

_ I sat at the ROM cafeteria, trying to think of what to get: pretzels or hickory sticks. _

"_Where is it?" A random voice(coming from behind her) muttered_

_I spun around. There was a middle aged woman with her hair done up in a bun and had a suit-skirt on. She looked all business. Probably was._

"_What are you looking for?"_

"_My glasses. I can't see them anywhere!"_

_I looked over to the right. There was a kid looking at the woman. It was a kid from my school. He was a grade two BRAT. And he had her glasses. I walked over and said with as much authority as possible:_

"_Brady, hand the woman her glasses."_

"_You're going to have to catch me…hey! No fair!" He complained. I had already "caught" him._

"_Give. Her. Back. The. Glasses. NOW." Oh, I can be stern if I want to._

_He walked over and threw them at her face. I quickly looked if there were any teachers looking, and then threw HIM in the organics bin. His squeals of disgust were music to my ears._

"_Thanks for dealing with that horrible child."_

"_No problem-o Ma'am. My name is Riesa. Who are you?"_

"_Katelyn Smith. I'm staying at suite 45 in that building, if you want to visit."_

_Flashback ends._

I remembered! Suite 45! All I needed to do was…*ring* *ring*. What now?! I ran to the phone, but on the way their, I tripped on two teething rings, a full bottle, the garbage can, and finally, my radio. The answering machine got it before I could.

*beep* Hi Riesa, honey! Can you tidy the house for us? We want the house spotless when we come home.

Just what I needed; House cleaning AND babysitting. I grabbed the vacuum cleaner and plugged it in. Both babies were sleeping, so it was a good time to do so. I took the nozzle…and something took it out of my hand. I took a closer look. It was Bobby. Then, he landed on the table. He also dropped the nozzle. On my cat. Have you ever wondered why cats are so afraid of vacuums? I know why. I heard Blackie yowl. I was afraid she had woken up Daniel(or SD). But that was the least of my problems. I looked at Blackie and gasped. She was pink. Furless. NAKED! I saw the very last hair go through the tube. I grabbed her winter jacket, and put it on my cat.

"Riesa, I don't feel well."

I looked over. There was Daniel, well, not a healthy looking one. Actually, a very grey one. I picked him up over the shoulder. And in thanks, he threw up all over my shoulder and on my back too.

Spring Cleaning was going to have to wait. I had a sick person to take care of. Bobby looked grossed out. I would have made a face too, but I preferred that Daniel didn't know. I took a cloth to his face and put him to bed. He looked up at me with his haunting ice blue eyes, as if he was trying to connect me with someone he knew. His eyes closed, and he fell asleep. I decided to postpone the spring cleaning. I finally realized he had been sick before this started. I realized that keeping these two safe-and Bobby healthy, was a lot harder then I expected…

**How was that? Did you like this chapter? I hope you did! I only know if you review? Do you have any complaints? I can't change anything I don't know. After all, I may write it, but you read it. (Don't deny it! You're doing it right now!)**


	8. Kidnapping

**Hi Loyal Readers! It's Blaze808 with the latest chapter of Baby Rivals. This is the third last chapter to this story (Not counting the epilogue) I hope you enjoy!**

**I do not own Pendragon or Up(there is a reference to it)**

**Chapter 8: Kidnapping**

The next day, I was pumped and ready. A little scared too, but I was going to help save the world, so I guess this was the normal feelings. I think. I was walking to get the boys ready. I walked into the room. Bobby had my cat…or rather, her butt aimed at a sleeping Daniel.

"Oh Danny…" His voice hinted to mischief in mind

Daniel yawned and looked up…right at Blackie's butt(accidentally)

"EWWWWWWWWWW! Get the kitty away!"

I walked in and grabbed the two, got them ready, and then walked out to the taxi and told him I was going to the ROM. As any good taxi driver should, he drove me there in a hurry. Though that may have had to do with the fact Daniel had thrown up twice in the taxi. Bobby seemed to look relieved to get out of there too. I walked into Suite 45.

There was Nevva Winter, or Katelyn Smith, sitting on the couch.

"Hi Katelyn, or Nevva, um…what do you prefer?"

"Who is with you?" She asked a little suspiciously

"Oh! This is Bobby and Daniel. Apparently you know him." I stated, pointing to Daniel.

She grabbed Daniel and asked worriedly "What happened to them?"

I told her everything I knew. She looked at Daniel and well, kind of yelled at him…

"What were you thinking? I told you to stay in bed!"

"But…"

"You can't help out when you're sick! You have to get better!"

"I was worried…"

"I can handle things on my own! I know we are not a couple or anything like that, but it doesn't help our cause, if you decide to fight when you shouldn't no…CAN'T!"

I thought this was amusing. Bobby thought it was downright hilarious. She just set him down. He had a strange look on his face, like in _Up_, when Doug wears the "cone of shame". Then I looked up. What I saw next was far from funny: A machine with mechanical arms…with my cousin. Bobby noticed too. If you remember correctly, my cousin, and his girlfriend is the same person. Before he could scream, I clamped his mouth shut. As much as I wanted to hurt the person in the vehicle, I knew better. I could bet anything, that she was the bait. Actually, Nevva was bait too, for it decided to take her up. It's very easy to say, the boys were very mad. They both ran up to me, and started yelling at me. I knew what they wanted. Still, it was hard for me to hear anything.

"Guys! Calm down."

They both stopped. I was about to speak, when I was interrupted.

"Hello, pathetic earthlings. I see you are gazing on my bait. If you don't hand over the babies, they will be baconfied!

After all the bullies I have pounded, and humiliated, and put in mental hospitals, I decided to put my strategy in use. I took my breakfast, and threw it at the machine.

SPLAT!

"Herb! What happened to you?" He looked at me

"YOU! YOU are responsible. I will kill you first!"  
Oops…

The machine opened up his center. There was a missile launcher. And it was fired. He missed, but the building it did hit probably would get us. All of us ran. Nothing like a good life threatening situation to get you running…I could swear I saw a light in the distance. I felt like I was getting picked up. I heard a crash. Nothing landed on me. I was in the sky, falling, with the two. We crash-landed. Then everything went black.

**Oh NO! What will happen to Riesa and the boys? Keep on reading to find out…or wait until the next time. What did you think? Who saved them? Is it someone we know, or is it a character from one of my other stories? Let me know what or who it should be…feel free to list characters from A Queen's Story or Many Years Ago, or Pendragon for that matter. You can also send in your own OC, I might use him (or her) for the characters' saviour! **


	9. A Futuristic Helper

'**Sup Loyal Readers! Since no one sent in an idea, I decided to use my original idea. Will I tell you? No, not right now! Here's a clue: it's a character in Chapter 5 of A Queen's Story, the sole Legend of Zelda/Pendragon crossover. Anyway, enough about that…enjoy the second last official chapter of Baby Rivals: A Futuristic Helper**

**Chapter 9: A Futuristic Helper**

After awhile, we woke up. I groaned, what had just happened? Then I looked up. There was a woman, in shiny black armour, with piercing green eyes and long, flowing brown hair. She was thin, and her body took on a bluish haze.

"Hello, Riesa." Her voice was delicate, and welcoming. But how did she know my name?

"My name is Joanna. I am a Twili, or also known as a Kindra. Do not be alarmed. I come from four years in the future. I am a servant in my master and king's castle, and you are my friend."

Then I noticed the babies were with her. Bobby was yanking her hair, and Daniel was just staring at her. It was quite cute.

"Do you know who they are?"

"Yes, very much so." She looked sadly at the two boys.

I decided not to ask about that.

She smiled "These two remind me of my own son, when he was their age, well, the age they are now."

"How do you cure this?"

"Only the Baconater knows."

Bobby cut us off. "Then let's 'ask' him."

We walked over, and saw a large pig on the ground. Daniel climbed out of Joanna's arms, turned into a baby raven, and tentatively, pecked its face. Then went at it like a drill.

"Aye! Bird ! Off the face, will ya? I'm not a tree!"

Daniel turned back, screamed, then crawled onto a 'safe place', or rather, Joanna's head.

"Sorry 'bout that kid. I don't like nobody pecking at my face, like it's a tree."

"Who are you?" I asked rather nervously.

"The name's Herb. Who are you?"

"I'm Riesa, this is Joanna, and that's Bobby and Daniel."

" 'Ello! Have you seen a loony pig recently? Not me of course. Also calls himself the Baconater."

"Yes, for a matter of fact. Do you know how to defeat him?" Joanna's voice was all business.

"I could be the distraction, while you (pointing to Joanna) could free the girls, and you(pointing to me) could get the antidote. Take the babies with you."

"That sounds like it could work." Joanna mused

I agreed. It did sound like a good plan. Bobby noticed something, though…

"How do we get on?"

Joanna smiled, an all knowing smile, and warped us abord.


	10. Brawling in Toronto and Epilouge

**Hello Loyal Readers, this is the final official chapter including an epilogue to follow... and a special contest! So, enjoy the final chapter of Baby Rivals: Brawling in Toronto!**

**Chapter 10: Brawling in Toronto**

I felt many things, but the main thing to say, was that I was pumped. There was going to be the final battle, fought to the death…okay…sorry, didn't mean to turn nerdy on you. Joanna had run off to get the girls and I hadn't seen her since, and Herb had gone off to find the Baconater. Now, I had to pull my weight around. The boys were trying to find the antidote. And I was too. Bobby was running around. Daniel was checking the shelves for the 40th time already. Meanwhile, I saw two brussel sprouts that had an oddly pinkish hue to them. As I was about to examine them, a Comcast came on. It was the Baconater.

"Ah-HA! I knew that you would try to stop me meddlesome fools! So, I sent a spy to keep my eye on you!"

_Herb! Or was it Joanna?_ I wondered with some annoyance

Then to my most utter surprise, Blackie appeared on the screen.

"ME-ha-ha-ha! *Meow*!"

"It was the kitty-kat!" Bobby and Daniel shouted in the surprise

"I KNEW it…" Bobby muttered to himself. Always expect the dog-lover to blame the cat…

"Blackie, my sweet, finish them off." The Baconater waved off

"As you wish *meow* my king…" Blackie bowed (this is unbelievable, I know) and pulled out a machine gun.

Herb ran out.

"RUN! It's a hairball gun! And she's coming this way!"

We all ran out as I pocketed the brussel sprouts. I had a feeling that it was the antidote.

"Hello."

I looked back. The Baconater's "gun cat" was coming towards me, with her choice weapon aimed for my mouth.

"Say goodbye RiesAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!"

I looked behind her and to my surprise, Bobby had gotten her tail…with his mouth.

"Little kid…you will PAY!" Blackie hissed

"Whatever you say Blackie…or should I say Pinkie." I attempted to get her anger on me. Hairballs and teeth, no biggie, and besides, Mom and Dad had her declawed. Thank you Mom and Dad!

"Did you just call me Pinkie?" She hissed with fury

"What's the matter…Pinkie? Got a leak? If you're just cranky because of the vacuuming incident, get over yourself!"

"That's not it. I was with my master long before that. I was assigned to conduct the tests. One little howl, that triggered the implants, was all it took."

"Where are they?"

"It does you no good if you know, so I might as well reveal the locations. Bobby's is located on his left small toe, and Saint Dane's is on the tip of his nose."

"Wudolf the Wed Nose Weindeew, had a wery siny nose…"(That means "Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer, had a very shiny nose…")

"Bobby. Zip it." Saint Dane retaliated

"Then how would you cure it?"

The Baconater walked out.

"I would tell you that they have to eat the pinkish sprouts but I won't."

_Man, are all bad guys that stupid…probably._

"Okay, guys, open wide.

They did. As they swallowed the antidote, they grew larger, and their bodies started to mature. Then they were just like how I met them.

"EWWW! Blue gloid all over again!" Bobby gagged

"That was a rather unpleasant sensation, and I most definitely NOT do it again." He spoke in a calm matter.

Joanna ran out with the girls.

"Did we miss anything?" Joanna asked.

"Nope. The fun's about to begin." I said to the others and winked at the two villains(of this story) to let them know what was coming.

In three seconds, the Baconater and Blackie were flat(courtesy of Herb), had high heel prints on their heads(courtesy of Nevva), were nursing a black eye and broken ribs each(courtesy of yours truly), had been driven insane, and walking into walls(courtesy of Saint Dane) and for the final touch, thrown off the ship, strapped to a 50kg shield(shield courtesy of Joanna, and the throwing off part was courtesy of Courtney and Bobby).

"So, Courtney, busy tonight?" Bobby asked in a playful matter.

"Nope. Besides, the Geek is looking for you."

"Where's my boyfriend?" Nevva asked

I looked over to the window.

"Oh that's just nasty. I pity ANYONE under the window right now." I commented in disgust.

We all looked over and laughed.

Bobby went to the window beside

"Look out belowwww!"

"You are most certainly not amusing…"

**Epilogue**

_After I said my goodbyes to the now adult boys I watched, and to Joanna and Herb as they left for their own time/barn in Mississippi, I relaxed and watched TV, did everything that a normal teenager did. And then, one day, I was walking out to the bus stop, when a large wind picked me up, and blew me into an empty, green void. When I landed, I looked up._

"_Um…hello there! Welcome to the four corners."_

**By the way, the four corners are Shokerri(The location of Many Years Ago), Twilight(The location of A Queen's Story), Hyrule(The location of the Legend of Zelda series), Alagasiea(The enemy of Shokerri) and Mobious(The Sonic Comic Series main location)and Kindra(other location of Many Years Ago)  
**

**Did I mention I don't own Legend of Zelda, Inheritance Cycle or Sonic? **

**CONTEST!**

**We know what happened in the end, right? But what about Herb and Joanna's jobs, huh? What happened there you may ask. Well, the answer is…it's up to you! Send your ideas, and I will post them. But there are rules:**

**Do NOT put swearing in it.**

**This was a K rated story. I will not go further than K+!**

**No new main characters, please.**


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